i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
