after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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