question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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