I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
