so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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