remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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