I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
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