So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
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