what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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