Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
