winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
If I die, sorry about rent.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
