she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
