lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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