I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
