"it" just moved
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
