I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
