He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize