Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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