I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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