and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
You pole danced in your parka.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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