They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
