I'm going to rape someone's good day.
please come you make the beer taste better
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
