Can Purell be used as lube?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
