I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Randomize
