Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
