I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
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