There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Randomize
