How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
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