I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize