is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
