Why are handjobs necessary in class?
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
