you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Randomize
