At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize