yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
