I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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