He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
