a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
