She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
