dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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