After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
