Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
did i walk over a car last night?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Randomize
