I look better un-naked...
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize