im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
