Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
My ass is underappreciated
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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