Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Randomize
