Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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