new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
they need to just BURY HIM!
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
