Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
