I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
