Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
